Letting go: A guide for survivors

Letting go: A guide for survivors
Letting go A guide for survivors

Facing the loss of a family member or close friend is probably one of the most difficult challenges that life throws at us. When we've lost a partner, parent, brother or sister, we're likely to experience intense grief.

While death is a natural part of our lives, we may still be overwhelmed by shock, confusion and sadness that may trigger more extended periods of depression. Our feelings of sadness at the death of a loved one may lessen as time goes by, but it's essential to acknowledge the process of grieving and continue to look back on the times you spent together.

We all react differently when a loved one dies, and we all find unique ways of coping with grief. But there's no set time scale for grieving - for some people, it takes months, while others need a year or two to come to terms with their loss. But over time, most people can recover from the grief of bereavement if family and friends support them.

You may have heard about the phases of grief, from the initial shock and denial through anger, depression and finally taking a positive turn towards working through the loss. Most people will grieve for a while and then be able to move on with their lives. But others may need additional support as their grief prevents them from carrying out their usual daily activities. And not everyone experiences the stages of grief in chronological order. Instead, your feelings might swing back and forth from day to day, especially in the earlier stages of grieving.

Bach flowers mix 68: Bereavement

Bach flowers mix 68 helps to:

  • Deal with the shock of the death of a loved one 
  • Soothe the grief 
  • Reduce anger and aggression 
  • Combat dejection 
  • Accept the death of the loved one and let go 
  • Overcome and prevent possible hallucinations and fears
Discover how Bach flowers mix 68 can help you

Letting go of a loved one 

It's never easy to let go of a loved one. It can take time, but some healthy coping strategies may help someone who's grieving to accept their loss and find a new sense of purpose in life.

Take your time

There's no time limit on mourning. There are so many variables with grief, such as the age of the loved one, the length of your relationship and how they died - for example, was it sudden, natural, or traumatic? Different circumstances play into the length of time we need to accept our loss, and setting a time limit on grieving can add to the stress of bereavement. Instead, accept that everyone's different, and you'll be able to move on when you're ready.

Don't avoid others

If you avoid others, you're isolating yourself from a support network of family and friends who can help you with the process of healing. Talking about loss enables you to acknowledge what has happened and lets you share memories of your loved one.

Look after your physical health

Take care of yourself and your family. Grieving takes its toll physically as well as mentally. So check in on loved ones and make sure they're eating well, getting enough sleep and exercising regularly.

Have a funeral that honours their personality

A funeral lets you express your grief in a cathartic way. Organising a funeral that represents the core values and personality of the deceased is a way to celebrate their life and honour their memory. Writing a eulogy and choosing beautiful music, flowers and readings helps to carry you through the early days of grief and can bring a sense of closure.

Remember how they impacted your life and honour their legacy

Did your loved one have a strong influence on your life? Maybe they supported and inspired you during your education or perhaps you chose your career path to follow in their footsteps. Remembering how they helped you and continuing their achievements in your own life can help you to come to terms with your loss.

Help others to cope with the death of your loved one

When you spend time with other family members and friends of the deceased, it helps everyone cope. Whether it's looking at photos, listening to music or sharing memories, a little effort can make a massive difference for some people. And when you help others, it also allows you to feel better.

Remember anniversaries

The anniversary of losing a loved one can be difficult, but it can also be a time to celebrate and honour them. Choosing to do something positive to mark the date, whether it's raising funds for their favourite charity or planting a rosebush in their memory, can help you move forward and reconstruct your life.

Accept your emotions

It's always painful to lose someone, but it will get easier with time, and healthy coping mechanisms will help you get through. You'll probably experience a range of feelings, including anger, sadness and weariness. These emotions are completely natural, and it's helpful to recognise them. Bach Flower Mix 68 can help you in bereavement, soothing grief, reducing anger, fighting depression and helping you to accept your loss and let go.


Sources:

https://www.cruse.org.uk/

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/feelings-symptoms-behaviours/feelings-and-symptoms/grief-bereavement-loss/

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/bereavement/about-bereavement/


Marie Pure

Other articles


Find out if you're suffering from imposter syndrome

Find out if you're suffering from imposter syndrome

Do you sometimes feel your achievements are not the result of your hard work and skill but are just luck? And do you fear that one day, someone will reveal you as an imposter or fraud? You might have imposter syndrome!

Read the complete article

Do you 'Musturbate' too much

Do you 'Musturbate' too much?

Do you suffer from a disorder known as "musturbation"? This term was first coined in the 1950s by psychotherapist Albert Ellis and described the way a negative inner voice rules our minds and bludgeons us with words such as "must", "should", and "ought".

Read the complete article

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school?

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.

Read the complete article

Do you expect too much from others

Do you expect too much from others?

Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.

Read the complete article

fear of fireworks dogs

7 tips to help your dog with a fear of fireworks

As nice as it is for a person to celebrate New Year, it's not so nice for a dog, especially when the loud fireworks go off the whole night. This is really frightening for many dogs. Read our 7 tips on how you can help your dog with his fear of fireworks.

Read the complete article

verleden-loslaten

Letting go of the past: 5 tips

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Read the complete article

Do you expect too much from others Find out!

Do you expect too much from others? Find out!

Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?

Read the complete article

5 tips to survive autumn healthily

5 tips to survive autumn healthily

We simply can’t avoid noticing the changes all around us. Autumn is here... Autumn is also called a transitional season. Slowly and steadily, it prepares us for the transition...

Read the complete article

Mistakes as a Parent

Mistakes as a Parent

Can we learn from our mistakes and develop a stronger, healthier emotional bondwith our kids? To help you identify your weak spots, we’ve rounded up some of the most common mistakes parents make.

Read the complete article

What to do when the spark is fading

What to do when the spark is fading

Why do you feel butterflies at the start of a new romance, and how can you keep the flame burning in a long term relationship as the spark starts to fade?

Read the complete article

Free personal advice for your problem?

Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.

tom vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch

Yes, I want free advice

No thanks, I will do my own research